Disenchanted
by xSlytherclaWx
Summary: Maybe, everyone has a little bit of good in them. That girl Anne Frank thought so... RegulusCentric
1. Part One: The Beginning

_**Disenchanted**_

_**By NarnianAslan/xSlytherclaWx**_

_**Part One**_

_**Author's Note:**__ Haha, I finally brought myself to write a marauder's fic, and it's not even about Sirius! Ah well… this is about Regulus. I'm just weird that way. No, really. I was reading __**Mugglenet's What Will Happen in Harry Potter 7**__ (I recommend you read it), and I was on "R.A.B and the Missing Locket," and I thought that I could try my hand at a Regulus fanfic. AU of course (I have too many AU stories). Well, let me see, title is from MCR's the Black Parade CD, and Regulus and all the other characters you recognize are J.K. Rowling's._

**XXX**

Regulus POV

**XXX**

"Don't worry, Reggie. I'll be back before you know it," Sirius told me, putting a hand on my shoulder. I nodded slowly. I was going to miss him. I told him so.

"I'm gonna miss you Siri."

"I'll miss you too."

I tried to smile at my big brother. I didn't know how I'd live with my parents without him. All of my cousins were going to Hogwarts, too. Well, except for Bella, but she was mean to me and treated me like I was scum.

After the train left, Mum, Father, and I left for home. After dinner, I went to bed. But I couldn't go to sleep for a long time. I missed my big brother. And I'd have to wait a whole year before I could go to Hogwarts with him.

The next morning, I woke up to hear Mum screaming. That was nothing new. I knew it couldn't be me she was yelling about, because I wasn't even up yet. I crept over to the stairs so I could make out what Mum was screaming.

"_Gryffindor! The shame of it! He's ruined our family name! It's almost as bad as going to school with MUGGLES!"_

I gasped. My mother was yelling about Sirius! He got sorted into Gryffindor! I knew how bad that was, and she wasn't going to make life for him any better. I could still be nice to him, though. He _was_ my big brother after all.

**XXX**

_**Author's Note:**__ not the longest prologue ever, but it works. The next chapter will skip a few years… a lot of years, actually._

_P.S. I came back to do some editing… wow. It really freaked me out when Hermione said (about Regulus), _"Then if he became disenchanted…"_ I'd been listening to MCR when I thought the song "_Disenchanted_" fit Regulus, and that was mainly the lyrics. So I was like, "err... wow. That's freaky." It really was. Oh, and if you've never heard the song: Listen to it! It's one of their best, I think (though there isn't a My Chem song I don't like…)._


	2. Part Two: The Note

Disenchanted

_**Disenchanted**_

_**By xSlytherclaWx/NarnianAslan**_

_**Part Two**_

_**Author's Note: Okay, and then she finally realized she hadn't updated in forever… No, seriously. I've been so absorbed with **_**ITLO Skye Black**_** that I almost forgot all about poor Regulus and **_**Disenchanted**_**. So, without further ado: **_**Disenchanted, Part Two**_**. (haha I made a rhyme)**_

_**XXX**_

_**Regulus POV**_

_**XXX**_

**I took the notebook; the one with the Hogwarts crest embossed into the leather cover, and opened it. It had been a gift from Sirius, and I knew he'd be surprised if he found out I was writing in it, or that I even still had it. But I had to write these thoughts down, where Kreacher and my parents would never find them. Maybe Sirius might, one day, but I highly doubted it. I took a quill and began to write:**

Sometimes I think that Lizzy Prewett is my only friend. She's the only one who's really been concerned for me, anyway. Kreacher always thought I should keep up the "good" name of the House of Black, and do what Mother said. For a while, I believed him.

My parents had arranged for me to marry Meissa Montague. She loved me, I knew, but I never loved her. She was needy, vain, self-centered, and possessive. That alone was reason enough, but… somewhere along the way I'd fallen for a Muggleborn. Emmeline Vance.

Severus Snape was in the same boat I was, I knew, but he wouldn't admit it. He loved Lily Evans, no, wait, she was Lily Potter now. Sirius had been her husband's best man. I really did miss him. The Dark Lord, no I'm going to call him Voldemort here, really, no one will ever read this. Anyway, Voldemort had targeted Lily Potter and her son. Severus, I knew, didn't want this. I wouldn't be surprised if he was a spy for Dumbledore by now.

I wanted to get out. The first time I'd ever gone on a "mission" was the single most horrific day of my life. The screaming, the pleading, Bellatrix laughing while she tortured them, the woman crying "anything but my son!", the man was reduced to tears as well. When we'd arrived, the woman had looked at me. I was still wearing my mask, but I'd recognized her. Alice Longbottom. Lizzy's cousin. I was so sick afterwards; I couldn't stop vomiting. That memory will always haunt me; I still hear the screams in my sleep.

Lizzy, wow, she's the only person who didn't turn her back on me. Bellatrix was disgusted after that day; I hadn't stuck up for Dromeda, she hates me now, I was sure of it; Narcissa was too prissy. And Sirius had turned his back on me my first day at Hogwarts. I'll always be thankful to Lizzy for sticking by me. She should have been a Gryffindor, not a Ravenclaw; she was loyal as hell.

A few months back, for reasons unknown to either of us; Severus and I had gotten invited to a wedding. It was Gerard Rush and Antoinette Bellerose. Rush, by that time, had already had a big break with his band, Homecoming Havoc.

I went. I wanted to see it. Thinking of it now, Antoinette and Gerard had always gotten along with me. But it's no wonder, I'd often thought that Bellerose would have made a good Slytherin.

Sirius was there, he greeted me politely, his wife, Aza gave me a smile and a handshake. Aza had been Meissa's sister. Before she was disowned, that is.

I'd figured something out before that time, though. It made me a blood traitor of sorts. Voldemort was using Horcruxes, storing his soul inside of objects. One such was a locket. Kreacher told me all about it. I'm destroying it, tomorrow, I swear. I can't live this lie.

I have to thank Lizzy. She told me about this thing, the Holocaust. We were learning about it in Muggle Studies. She told me how sick and twisted the whole thing was. I agreed. Then she told me that Voldemort and the Death Eaters reminded her of Hitler and the Nazis. I'd stayed silent, because, based on what she'd said, it was true. She told me about Anne Frank, that little Jewish girl, she'd made me read her diary, Anne's that is. I'd commented on how sick it was to kill someone for their beliefs or for things they couldn't help.

I didn't realize what I'd said until after the words were out of my mouth. But it was too late. I'd turned sixteen a week before, and been branded for life as a Death Eater. It was a lifetime of servitude or death. Until I saw Bellatrix torture those poor people, I'd decided to serve.

Now all I want to do is die.

After the wedding, I'd told Lizzy that that was the last time she'd ever see me alive.

I hear her voice in my head so clearly, it makes me want to go to Dumbledore. But I'll never do that.

"_Regulus, you can't be serious! Die?"_

"_Remember Joan of Arc?"_

"_But that doesn't mean you have to kill yourself!"_

"_I'll be a martyr, Lizzy. It's for the good of the future."_

"_You're so damn prideful, Black! Can't you just go to Dumbledore?"_

"_You know I can't. Just remember the good of me. Please?"_

"_I'll try."_

"_Everyone has good and evil in them, that Anne Frank girl sure thought so."_

I'd hugged her. She was my best friend. It would have been wrong to have not said goodbye. When she finds out that I actually did die (well, I will) she'll probably shrug it off; then it'll hit her hard. She'll cry. I feel horrible already. But I can't live a lie.

Meissa will break down, I know it. She'll be reduced to nothing. I feel bad for that already, too, but it's better this way, isn't it? I mean, I haven't killed anyone, and I don't want to.

There was a time I might have wanted to; I wanted revenge, I wanted justice. But now, I'm sickened at the fact that I thought that.

Whoever's reading this; I pray you don't make the same mistakes I have.

I want to be like Sirius, like Andromeda, and get out of this damn thing. But it's too late for me.

I'm leaving tonight and I'm never coming back. I'm never coming home. I just whispered those words to myself, and they echoed in this damned room. _Never Coming Home, Never Coming Home, Never…_

I'm scared, I'll admit it. I'll never see anyone again. I'll never get to apologize to Sirius or Andromeda. If either of you are reading this, I'm sorry, so damned sorry. I was a pompous wanker of a coward. But I'm not like that anymore.

I love you two more than I can say. You're what I've always wanted to be, but never had the guts to try.

Sirius: I miss those days when we were little. I remember when you got Sorted; I swore I was never going to be an arse to you. I broke that promise, I'm sorry. I know you'll think it doesn't matter, but look, Sirius, you say people never change what they are deep down inside. I can remember the night you left. You said you were disappointed in me, you thought I was better than that. Than our parents. I cried that night, Sirius. I've always wanted to be as strong as you, but I never was. But you said something right before you left, do you remember? You said, "Regulus, don't follow in Bellatrix's footsteps. You're a leader, not a follower, don't start following now. I- you used to be my little brother, what happened? If you were in Gryffindor-" But I had cut you off. I said I never wanted to be in Gryffindor. You really have no idea how much of a lie that was. This damn ink is smearing. I'm actually crying right now, Sirius. I miss you more than I could ever say, and I wonder, every day of my life, what would have happened if I had been in Gryffindor. I guarantee you it would have been a damn sight better than this.

Andromeda: God, I really wish I'd stuck up for you. I wanted to, but I wasn't brave enough. I was stupid. I'd never dreamed a Slytherin, a Black, would turn her back on everyone she knew for love. But you proved me wrong; and I'm glad. You were my favorite cousin growing up. You'd make Sirius and I cookies the Muggle way, and they'd taste so good. So much better than anyone else's cookies. You showed me that magic isn't necessary, that we could make do without it. I wish I could say goodbye, so much. I remember the fight you had with your parents and Bellatrix. I'd thought you were so brave, and I was so afraid. I was afraid for you, you know that? I was afraid that you would get killed by Voldemort. I miss you.

My throat's constricting and my tears are falling. I'll miss you both so damn much. I wish I had a second chance, I'd do everything different. I want to apologize. If only I'd listened to you. Maybe I wouldn't be in this mess.

If this thing's been discovered long after I die (and I'm fairly sure it will be)- no wait, if this is discovered by someone other than Dromeda or Sirius, convey my messages to them, please.

My heart is breaking and these thoughts are racing through my head. I have to do this; I have to suffer. I've been such a horrible person; I deserve the pain I'm going to go through. I'm going to give Kreacher my memories, my most important memories, and have him put them into this box that this book will be in. Then I'll tell him to tell no one. Family or otherwise.

I'm sorry to everyone I've hurt. I hear the screams of Frank and Alice Longbottom, the pleading of Lizzy, Sirius yelling at me before he left, and Dromeda fighting with her parents. I hear them every night, and I'm hearing them now. I want you to know, I never did anything to the Longbottoms. I was supposed to watch, to learn.

This doesn't sound like it's coming from an eighteen year old, but I assure you, it is.

This is sending chills up and down my spine. I miss you all, but keep living, keep fighting.

--Regulus Arcturus Black

**I closed the leather book and placed it in a wooden box. It contained my old stuffed toy dog, Leo, and pictures of Emmeline, Sirius, Dromeda, Lizzy, and me. The reason I was doing this.**

_**XXX**_

_Author's Note: wow, this made me cry, damn. Not much makes me cry. Okay well I think the Part III is the last part, so one more…_


	3. Thunderstorms: Age Six

Disenchanted

_**Disenchanted**_

_**By xSlytherclaWx/NarnianAslan**_

_**The Memories**_

_**Author's Note: These chapters are made of what may seem like random flashbacks… it's Regulus's memories, the ones he puts in the vial… They're not necessarily happy memories, but they're very important. A few of these memories are written in a sort of one-shot format, but I really couldn't help it… I tried.**_

_**It's over the course of (counts) eleven chapters. **_

_**XXX**_

**Thunderstorms: Age Six**

Another bright flash of lighting illuminated the room of seven-year-old Sirius Black. He'd stayed up to watch, even though his mother would throw a fit if she knew.

To Sirius, thunderstorms were exciting and amazing.

Another loud rumble of thunder shook the floorboards as Regulus cowered in his bed. He was six years old, he wasn't a baby. But the thunderstorms scared him. He grabbed his stuffed dog, Leo, and quickly ran across the hall to his big brother's room.

To Regulus, thunderstorms were scary; something only his big brother could help him with.

"Siri?" he asked in a small voice. Sirius turned around.

"Regulus, what's wrong?"

"The storm."

"Come here," Sirius said. Regulus slowly made his way over to the window seat to sit with his big brother. Sirius put an arm around his shoulder. "The storm won't hurt you, you know that?"

"But they're scary!"

"Maybe, but see, it's all up in the sky… it can't hurt you down here."

"Are you sure?"

Sirius looked down at Regulus, who was looking up at him. "Pretty sure."

"Good."

"Reggie, I'm tired, do you wanna sleep with me?"

Regulus nodded quickly as a flash of lightning lit up the sky. Sirius climbed into bed, and Regulus curled up next to him. As the two brothers slept, the thunderstorm continued unnoticed.


	4. Muggle Cookies: Age Eight

**Muggle Cookies: Age Eight**

"Who wants some cookies?" Andromeda called, tucking a strand of brown hair behind an ear.

"Me!" Sirius and Regulus cried in unison. Had it not been for the height difference, the boys would have been nearly identical.

Andromeda smiled as she placed a plate of cookies on the table, which was low enough for both boys to reach. Sirius grabbed one before Regulus could and stuffed it into his mouth.

"These are good!" Sirius yelled. "What did you do?"

"I'll tell you what I didn't do."

"Wha' dinn't you do?" Regulus asked; his mouth stuffed with cookie.

"I didn't use magic."

Regulus and Sirius promptly spit out their cookies in surprise; Sirius grabbed another one, Regulus didn't.

"But Mum said that Muggles are bad, and you shouldn't do _anything_ the Muggle way," Regulus recited.

"Sometimes, Regulus, our mums aren't always right."

"How do you know?"

"I just do."

"You went into the Muggle world!" Sirius gasped. Regulus's eyes grew wide.

"Boys, what you need to understand is that not all Muggles are bad... they're a little like Wizards with that."

"Muggles aren't like Wizards!" Regulus yelled.

"Reggie... come here."

Regulus didn't move; he sat frozen on the floor. Andromeda rolled her eyes and sat so that she was eye-level with him. "Regulus, look, I love you and Sirius very much, so please trust me when I say that Muggles aren't evil."

"Dromeda you're not going to leave us, are you?" Sirius asked.

"I don't know, Sirius."

Sirius jumped out of his chair and hugged Andromeda as tightly as he could. "Don't leave us. _Please_."

Andromeda didn't reply. "Can I tell you two a secret?"

Regulus and Sirius both nodded very slowly.

"You promise not to tell? Both of you?"

"I promise," Sirius said.

"Me too," Regulus whispered.

"I have a boyfriend."

Sirius let go of Andromeda. "Why would you want a boyfriend?"

"I love him. His name is Ted Tonks, and I want to marry him."

"Tonks isn't a pureblood name," Regulus said quietly.

"He's not a pureblood," Andromeda said, looking both boys straight in the eyes.

"He's a Mudblood?" Regulus asked.

"Regulus, _never_ use that word again. It's really mean," Andromeda scolded. Regulus nodded meekly. She continued. "He _is_ a Muggleborn. But that really doesn't matter at all. He's really nice, and sweet, and he loves me. I love him. He asked me something before I left for summer."

"What'd he ask you?" Sirius asked.

"He asked me if, after we got out of school, I'd marry him."

"Did you say yes?" Regulus whispered.

"Yes. Don't tell anyone, okay?"

"Okay," Regulus and Sirius said together.

"Now, you two have eaten all of the cookies."

Sirius laughed.

"How about I show you how to make Muggle cookies?"

"Is it messy?" Sirius asked.

"Very."

"I wanna help!" Regulus yelled.

"Okay, okay, you can both help."

Regulus and Sirius cheered, and Andromeda smiled.


	5. Andromeda: Age Nine

**Andromeda: Age Nine**

"Get out! Get out!"

Andromeda whirled around; she'd already put all of her bags by the door. "Oh, don't worry, _Mother_, I'm leaving!"

"Dromeda," Sirius whined. Fifteen-year-old Narcissa pushed him out of the way.

"Move it," she hissed, "I wanna watch this."

"Andromeda Black-!"

"Don't you dare call me that again! I don't want to be part of this stupid family!"

"Dromeda," Sirius whined again.

"Sirius and Regulus are the only two worth anything here, and I really wonder if you'll manage to pollute their minds, too!"

"Pollute-?" 

"_Stop it!_ Stop yelling at her! She's _right!_ This whole family's stupid! I wanna go with you, Dromeda, take me and Reggie with you!" Sirius cried.

"Sirius... I-"

"Leave right now!" Cygnus barked.

Regulus looked sadly at Andromeda. He wanted to stick up for her... he wanted to go with her... but he wasn't brave like Sirius.

"Where will you stay, Andromeda, darling?" Bellatrix asked with a cruel smirk. "We don't want you."

"Bella, maybe if you'd hand me that bag?" Andromeda asked, reaching her left hand towards a bag next to her elder sister.

"You're married?" she shrieked.

Sirius quickly ran and handed the bag to Andromeda.

"Yes, to a _Muggleborn_," she said with relish.

Bellatrix was dumbstruck. Andromeda continued, "I'm going to move in with him. We'll be on our own, but he's got a really. Good. Job."

"Andromeda, I _want _to go with you! Take me and Regulus _with_ you!"

"Sirius, you don't want to be around blood traitors like _her_," Narcissa scoffed.

"Yes. I. _Do_! She's the _only _one of you who cares about anyone _other _than themselves! She's my favorite cousin! You and Bellatrix are stuck up, selfish _beasts_! Take me with you, Dromeda, _please_, take me with you!"

"You will not touch my children!" Walburga yelled.

"I don't want to be your child!" Sirius yelled.

Regulus couldn't take it anymore. He was either going to yell, and agree with Sirius, or leave and cry. He chose the latter.


	6. Anarchy in the UK: Age Fourteen

**Anarchy in the U.K.: Age Fourteen**

"Sirius, this is just… stupid," Regulus muttered.

Sirius threw a Muggle outfit at him. "Like it or not, we're going to see this band, James said that they're brilliant, and they're not playing too far from here. Now put that on. Punks dress different from other Muggles, but I doubt they dress like Wizards."

"Mum and Dad will kill you."

"No they won't. They're over at the Malfoys' Place until tomorrow night. Kreacher won't tell them because we'll tell him_ not _to tell them."

"It doesn't sound worth the risk, Sirius. Besides, what do you know about Muggle money?"

"Nothing," Sirius answered. "Which is why we're meeting Remus and James… Remus knows how to handle Muggle money. Now, get dressed, or I'll tell Mum that you were the one who drank all of that firewhiskey, not Bellatrix, as previously thought."

Regulus realized that he'd better do what Sirius said; he wasn't joking. "Fine. I'll be back in a few minutes."

He came back in about five minutes later, dressed in full-out punk: an old "anti"-Beatles t-shirt ripped and then safety-pinned back together, old baggy pants, and chains. "Sirius, there's no way in hell I'm wearing this."

"Your hair's just not right yet."

"No way," Regulus said; his eyes wide. "Don't you dare, Sirius."

"What? I can't touch your hair?"

"If you mess up my hair, I'll chop yours off while you're sleeping."

"Fine, fine. No punk hair, then."

Regulus half-smiled, obviously in spite of himself.

"But now we've got to get going. Kreacher!"

The Elf appeared, shooting a glare at Sirius. "Yes?"

"Regulus and I are going somewhere; don't tell anyone about this, ever. That's an order."

"Sirius, that's just…" Regulus turned to Kreacher. "Kreacher, I really would like it if you don't tell anyone, and that _is_ an order, but I apologize for Sirius's lack of respect, okay?"

"Okay, Master Regulus." Kreacher left, and Sirius gave Regulus a look that was a cross between amusement and disgust.

"Let's get going."

The trip to wherever they were going was short and quiet. Sirius spotted his friends (James looking excited and Remus looking annoyed) and dragged Regulus over to them.

"So what's this band called?" Sirius asked.

"The Sex Pistols," Remus and James said, as if they'd told him multiple times before.

"Right. Well, I dragged Regulus here, and the elf won't tell, so I think I'm good."

Regulus rolled his eyes.

"Well, actually, he came out of his own free will," Sirius smirked.

"Didn't wear this outfit out of free will," Regulus muttered.

Sirius laughed. "So, when does it start?"

"Pretty soon actually…" Remus said.

"Wicked. Let's get in there, then."

**XXX**

_Note: Originally not-written… but I was reading Johnny Rotten's autobiography… I couldn't help myself (for those who are unfamiliar with the Pistols, Johnny Rotten (real name: John Lydon) was the lead singer of the Sex Pistols._

_And I'm not updating until I have at least 9 reviews total._


	7. Sirius: Age Fifteen

**Sirius: Age Fifteen**

"Regulus, I'm leaving tonight."

"No you're not," Regulus said. His face was emotionless, his tone dull; he and Sirius had obviously had the same conversation many times before.

"Yes, I am. I can't take it here!"

"Sirius, you turn seventeen in eleven months, two weeks, and five days. You won't be able to do magic outside of school, and I know you don't want to get expelled, that would mean leaving your friends. Logically, you have to stay." Sirius didn't hear the longing in his younger brother's voice.

"How the hell did you get the amount of days until I'm seventeen?"

"Sirius, you seem to forget that you and I share a birthday."

"And the day I turn seventeen is the day Bellatrix wants you to join the Nazi Party."

"The what?" Regulus asked, confused.

"Death Eaters. Evans wouldn't stop going on about World War II... she said that the Death Eaters are just like the Nazis and so forth."

"I..."

"You don't need to tell me... I know you'll join them."

"Sirius…"

"Regulus, don't follow in Bellatrix's footsteps. You're a leader, not a follower, don't start following now. I- you used to be my little brother, what happened? If you were in Gryffindor-"

"I don't want to be a goddamned Gryffindor!" Regulus yelled.

"Right, you're a Slytherin…" Sirius sneered. He went into the next room, where there was a series of loud noises. When he emerged, he was dragging behind him most of his belongings.

"Sirius, what the hell are you doing?" Regulus cried.

"What does it look like? I'm leaving!"

"You can't!"

"I can and I am! I'm sure James'll let me stay with him."

Regulus followed his brother downstairs. "Really, Sirius, you're-"

"I can't fucking take this place! Andromeda had had the sense to leave, and now I'm following her example!"

"Don't _leave_!"

"Regulus, I'm disappointed in you."

"What-?"

Sirius turned around to face his brother. "I thought you were better than this, better than this hellhole, and this prejudice, and the people who call themselves our parents."

"I thought you were supposed to my older brother!"

"You disowned me the second I became a Gryffindor, don't you dare lie and say otherwise!"

"No I didn't!" Regulus laughed exasperatedly. "I stuck up for you against the rest of the family that whole damn year, Sirius! If anything,_ you're_ the one who disowned _me_!"

"I never disowned you! But I've chosen my path, Reg, now you can choose yours. Goodbye, I'll see you in school, I'm sure."

Sirius walked out the door, and slammed it shut behind him. "Sirius!" It was too late, Sirius was gone.

Regulus ran straight back to his room, slammed the door, and collapsed on his bed.

_Author's Note: yeah, looking at the Black Family Tree, I realized that Regulus was born in 1961, not 1960, as would be the case here, but just… ignore that. I know I've got inaccuracies as far as dates and years… but I've written it all, so no changey._

_**Also: I've got a load of people adding this and other stories to their favorites and alerts, but not reviewing.**_

_**That gets me angrier than flames, because at least they're some sort of feedback (albeit negative). I mean, sure I've been guilty of reading stories but not reviewing, but I've **__**never**__** added a story to my alerts/faves without reviewing, that's just like… dude, that's just annoying.**_

_**So, I mean it this time:**_

_**10 or more reviews total or NO UPDATES.**_

_**You lot got lucky-ish last time.**_

_**Review. 10 or more or no update.**_


	8. Lizzy Prewett: Age Fifteen

**Lizzy Prewett: Age Fifteen**

Regulus glanced over at the Gryffindor table where Sirius was laughing with his friends. Next to him, Severus Snape was glaring at James Potter.

"Severus, it's no use. Potter's going to keep chasing after Lily," Regulus sighed.

"He's right, you know."

Regulus and Severus jumped, startled. A girl, sitting at the Ravenclaw table, was turned around in her seat, facing them.

"Prewett, leave me alone," Severus muttered.

"I'm Lizzy Prewett," she said to Regulus. "Ravenclaw, obviously. I'm in Fifth Year."

"His brother ran away over the holidays," Severus said. Regulus glared at him. "Not even two weeks after their birthday," he continued, "His brother is exactly one year older than him."

"Get the fuck out of my head, Severus!"

Severus smirked. "It's a shame Potter knows something of Occulmency. I could invade his private thoughts, too."

"Legilimency? That's really useful, actually. But you're fifteen and that good?" Lizzy asked.

"Try two days at my house. You'd practice Legilimency and Occulmency every day."

"I'll take your word."

"Regulus is taking Muggle Studies and needs some-" Severus was cut off by Regulus stabbing his arm with a fork.

"You need help?" Lizzy asked. "I take Muggle Studies and got all O's."

"Yes, he needs help, and he also needs to grow up. A _fork_?"

"It got you to shut up, didn't it? And yes, I _am_ getting a D in Muggle Studies. But I don't need help."

"Ooh, yes you do. A D? Are you joking? That's one grade away from a T!"

"I realize."

"I'll help you. Free of charge. My cousin Alice needed my help and I charged her a sickle an hour."

"Why free of charge?" Regulus asked.

"Because you're almost at a T. Alice had an A."

"Fine. We're about to go into Muggle history and I won't follow any of it, I know. I could use the help."

"Great!"


	9. Selling Your Soul: Age Sixteen

**Selling Your Soul: Sixteenth Birthday**

"Are you ready, Regulus?" Bellatrix asked.

Regulus nodded timidly. Wasn't he just proving Sirius right? It appeared as though he didn't care.

Bellatrix led him into the large chamber. "My lord, this is the cousin I was speaking of." She sounded like she was in love with Voldemort. Was she? "He wishes to join your servants."

Anyone who knew Regulus knew that that wasn't true. But neither Bellatrix nor Voldemort did know him.

"Blood status?" Voldemort had a high voice. Lizzy would be laughing, and so would Sirius.

"Pure," Regulus said.

"If I were to allow you to join the noble ranks of the Death Eaters, what would be your reaction?"

"I would say that I was honored."

"Honored, what?"

"Honored, my lord," Regulus corrected himself.

"You catch on quickly. I must confer with your cousin momentarily, you may wait outside."

Regulus bowed and left, not showing his back to Voldemort. He stood in silence for a long moment; it was obvious to anyone looking that he was thinking hard, perhaps even regretting coming.

"Regulus," Bellatrix called. The sixteen-year-old boy went back into the chamber slowly. Why didn't he run out?

He made the vow to serve; the Dark Mark was engraved into his flesh, ugly and jet-black.


	10. Holowhat?: Age Sixteen

**Holo-what?: Age Sixteen**

"So those things those punk people wear are hate symbols?" Regulus asked. Lizzy gave him an odd look.

"Reg, where did you see punk rockers? Your family's mental."

"I… er… I went into Muggle London! I couldn't help it! It was so tempting, Lizzy! There was this mad bloke… he had green hair, and it was all chopped up."

"That would be punk," Lizzy said. "And yes, the swastikas are hate symbols, much like the Dark Mark."

"You're drawing all of these parallels. Surely the Death Eaters aren't like the Nazis?"

"They are. The prejudice, the hate, the senseless mass murder, the big leader with the loads of servants; it's all there. The Death Eaters are the Nazis and the Muggles and Muggleborns are the Jews. Though, the Jewish people weren't the only persecuted. There were blacks, homosexuals, disabled, Roma, Poles… even just random people without blonde hair and blue eyes."

"So I'd be dead?"

"It's likely. If not for your appearance, the fact that you live in London would do it. They were bombed pretty heavily."

"I'd… surely magic would be of some protection?"

"Magic isn't always the answer," Lizzy sighed. "Wizards and Muggles alike died, lost homes, lost friends, lost family."

"Much like now…" Regulus muttered.

"Yes. Now, you've read Anne Frank's diary like I'd asked?"

"Yeah."

"What did you think?"

"I thought it was amazing how people could be so cruel… and not in a good way. She was just a little girl, wasn't she? And they murdered her like that?"

"She was almost sixteen when she died," Lizzy said quietly.

"Even so, it's sick, isn't it? They murdered her for something she couldn't even _help_."

Lizzy gave him a look.

"Oh."


	11. Star Crossed Lovers: Age Seventeen

_Author's Note: And here enters the romance…_

**Seventeen Years Old: Star-Crossed Lovers**

The scene was dark, an abandoned corridor. Barely any light shone through, though it was clearly daytime. The noise of chatter in nearby corridors was proof enough.

"You shouldn't be here."

A girl stepped out of the shadows. Nearly waist-length golden blonde hair framed a pretty face with light blue eyes. "And who are you to tell me what I should do?"

"You've got class," Regulus muttered. "Muggle Studies."

"So have you. Besides. I already know everything about Muggle life."

He smirked. "Well… that much is true. Emmeline, what are you doing here?"

"Why do you like the Sex Pistols?"

"Em, you're in a corridor alone with a Death Eater to have a chat about _music_?"

"Answer my question."

"Well," he considered, "they're rebellious. Not afraid to be themselves. Their clothes make you stop and stare, but they don't give a damn. And really, they're just kids, barely into their twenties. I mean, Merlin, they're not much older than us. The shows are brilliant. Hair's all sorts of different colors. And they love to make a huge scene."

"So, they stand up for what they believe in?"

"Yeah, I guess so."

She gave him a look. "And they're your heroes?"

"Yeah…" he said slowly.

"Interesting."

"How so?"

"There you stand, claiming the Sex Pistols as your heroes, standing up for your House-Elf, not hexing or cursing me. But that Mark's on your arm. It's hypocritical."

"You know that I don't like this bloody Dark Mark any more than you do. But… you need to consider something."

"Not this 'join or die' again," Emmeline groaned.

"That's what it was."

"You could have run away. Don't argue that that would've been cowardice. That would have taken daring, and nerve."

"And chivalry? Em, I'm not a Gryffindor."

"So? That doesn't matter. Which do you, as a _person_, think is more cowardly?"

She hesitated before going on. "I'm listening," Regulus said as he leaned easily against a wall.

"Running away to a cousin's or friend's house… leaving all that prejudice behind… or faking it? Cursing people for something you don't believe in? For something you _hate_?"

"You know the answer to that, but you _also_ know it's too late."

"Go to Dumbledore."

"No, I can't. He won't help me."

"He might," she whispered.

"He won't, Emmeline. I've considered it, you know that? And it wasn't for Lizzy, or Brendon, or Sirius, or Aza, and definitely not for Meissa. If I won't go to Dumbledore for _you_, Em, there's no way I'm going."

"Why won't you go for me?"

"Do you want the honest answer?"

"What do you think?"

"I'm afraid," he muttered. "Because, if he won't help me, Em, no one will."

She closed her eyes. "You can try though, can't you?"

"I can," he said quietly, "but I won't.

"Do you know Gerard Rush's band has a single out?"

"What's it called?"

"_Our Lady of Sorrows_."

"Sing a verse?" he asked.

"_We could be perfect one last night. And die like star crossed lovers when we fight. And we can settle this affair. If you would shed your yellow, take my hand and then, we'll solve the mystery of laceration gravity_."

"That's us, isn't it? Star-crossed lovers? Death Eater and Auror."

"I'm not an Auror just yet," she whispered.

"But you will be."

"Reg…" she pleaded. "Go to Dumbledore."

"I've told you; I can't, love."

"We've got our N.E.W.T.s in two weeks," she whispered. "We won't see each other after, will we?"

He looked as if he was going to say something different, but he sighed. "No, probably not. At least, not until after the war, and that's if both of us make it through… I hope we do."

"I'll miss you."

He crossed the corridor and put his arms around her, holding her tightly. "I'll miss you, too."

"I love you," she whispered.

"I love you, too, Em."

_Author's Note: Er, yeah. "Our Lady of Sorrows" and lyrics property of My Chemical Romance. For those of you who didn't realize it: Emmeline (in this story at least) is a Muggleborn. She's a Gryffindor, too, so… yeah, she and Regulus doing… things… isn't exactly good._

_Review, please!_


	12. Kreacher: Age Seventeen

**Kreacher's Tale: Age Seventeen**

"Kreacher! What happened to you?"

The Elf told Regulus the whole, sad story, and by the end of it, Regulus was furious.

"Kreacher, I don't want you to tell anyone about this."

Kreacher nodded.

"Good. I'm sorry I got you into that."

"Master Regulus didn't know, Kreacher forgives him."

"Thank you, Kreacher, that means a lot to me."

Kreacher nodded.

"Now, Kreacher, could you tell me what the locket looked like?"

Kreacher nodded again. "Kreacher saw it. It was as big as a chicken's egg and gold."

"What else?"

"Kreacher thinks he saw a snake on it."

"The Slytherin House snake?"

Kreacher nodded.

"Don't tell anyone else, Kreacher, okay?" Regulus repeated.

_Author's Note: Reviews are appriciated! I know this is really short, but once I see one review, the next memory will be up._


	13. Russian Roulette: Age Eighteen

**Age Eighteen: Russian Roulette**

Regulus opened his eyes and looked around the room; Emmeline's room. Everything was a shade of red or gold, shockingly contrasting to his room at home.

Emmeline herself was sleeping; her head resting on his chest.

He looked as if he wanted nothing more than to go back to sleep. After all, it was a Saturday, most teenagers don't wake up at –he glanced at the clock–5:14 in the morning.

He looked resentfully at his left forearm.

"Reg?" Emmeline whispered. "What're you doing up?"

"This fucking Mark," he muttered. "It's burning, and, I can't not go… But…"

"No. You have to go…"

"I wish… five more minutes… I mean, come _on_. It's a quarter-past five."

"I know…"

He groped for his wand on the nightstand and magicked his clothes on. Emmeline did the same for herself.

"I might as well get up now," she whispered.

"I… I'll come back if I can," he assured her, giving her a hug, "Maybe not straightaway, but… I _will_ come back, and if-if I die, well… I'll send Kreacher."

"It's like Russian Roulette."

He looked down at her questioningly. She met his gaze.

"It's a risk game. You take a Muggle six-barrel gun, only load one cartridge into its cylinder, spin it, close it, point it to your head, and fire. There's a one in six chance you die. If there's more than one person, you take turns until one person winds up dead… they're the winner. That's what happened to my parents. Except, when my dad saw what happened, he shot himself… I know, I saw it."

"That's awful," he whispered.

"I know. Then I went to live with the Lupins… that's why I've known Remus so long… his parents were my godparents, ironic, considering that neither of my parents were magic, and I turned out to be."

"I love you, Em. Always will…"

"Love you too," she whispered. "Now… go, before you get into too much trouble."

He released her. "'Bye, Love. Happy early Christmas."

"Happy Christmas…"

He smiled briefly before Disapparating.

_Author's Note: First off: __**I do not support suicide or suicidal games such as Russian roulette. I'm not recommending you play it, either.**__ All that is via Wikipedia. (I heard "Russian roulette" in an Escape the Fate song first, and a friend of my sisters heard it playing, and told me what it was)_

_Right, well, review, please!_


	14. Leaving Out All The Rest: Age Eighteen

**Leaving Out All the Rest/Joan of Arc: Age Eighteen**

"Congratulations," Regulus said.

"It's not like we don't have you to thank," the bride, Antoinette, smiled.

"Lizzy's idea," he said. "I just helped."

"According to Lizzy you were the one to come up with the idea," Gerard said.

Regulus shot a glare at a brunette, who was laughing with her date.

"…Congratulations, anyway."

Gerard and Antoinette laughed. Regulus made his way over to the girl he'd glared at earlier.

"Elizabeth Marie Prewett…"

"Regulus Arcturus Black," she countered with a laugh. She was pretty, with dark blue eyes and dark brown hair.

"Why'd you tell Gerard and Antoinette that I came up with the idea to leave them at the cinema?"

She laughed. "Because it _was_ your idea." 

Regulus groaned. "All I need is Sirius hearing I snuck off to Muggle London more times than he had."

"You put too much store in what others think."

"You don't care enough what people think."

"It's great to see you, Reg!" Lizzy grinned, throwing her arms around his neck. "You know Brendon Poe, don't you?"

"Your fiancé? Yes, I know him, I'm the one that pointed out that he fancied you, remember?"

She turned red.

"Good to see you again, Brendon."

"You too, Regulus."

"Lizzy, can I talk to you?" Regulus asked.

"Sure…"

They walked to the parking lot. "Lizzy… I want you to know that you're my best friend, and nothing could ever change that. But, you know what I am… I've found a way to bring him down."

"You have?"

"Yes, but… I can't tell you, it's too dangerous, just knowing about it. But, for me to do this, I –I'm going to die. I have to… it's the only way."

"Regulus, you can't be serious! Die?" Lizzy's eyes were wide and fearful.

"Remember Joan of Arc?"

"But that doesn't mean you have to kill yourself!"

"I'll be a martyr, Lizzy. It's for the good of the future."

"You're so damn prideful, Black! Can't you just go to Dumbledore?" she asked.

"You know I can't. Just remember the good of me. Please?"

"I'll try."

"Everyone has good and evil in them, that Anne Frank girl sure thought so."

She closed her eyes and took in a deep breath. "Even so…"

"Lizzy." The tone of his voice was quiet, but final.

"All right, Regulus. I'll remember the good times."

"Thanks," he said. He hugged her. "'Bye, Lizzy."

"Won't you stay just a little bit longer?"

"I can't. If anyone asks, be sure to tell them I did the right thing."

"I'll be sure to tell Sirius and Andromeda, Reg."

Regulus released her and gave her a sad smile, which she returned. "Don't cry for me, okay?"

She nodded. "'Bye, Reg."

He left for his house, looking back only once, but Lizzy had gone back inside.


	15. Romeo and Juliet: Age Eighteen

**Age Eighteen: Romeo and Juliet**

It was early in the morning, and Regulus and Emmeline were lying in her bed, she had her head on his chest and he was stroking her hair.

"Remember Muggle Studies?" Regulus asked. "In sixth year?"

Emmeline nodded. "You and Sirius played the Tarleton twins, even though you had to get a charm put on you to make you as tall as Sirius and Charity Burbage had to do a charm to switch Lily's hair color with yours and Sirius's. I played Carreen… wait, that's not what you were trying to ask, was it?"

His silence was proof enough that it was.

"I know you're going to do this, but you don't need to be asking if I'm going to ship myself off to a convent!"

"I know you won't… but… remember Scarlett, after Charles died?"

"You mean to ask what if I were to get pregnant, before…?"

"Well… don't let's pretend it's impossible, love." He looked at the sheets that were covering them.

"Then, I… I don't know. I'd have to tell Remus, and well…"

"I wouldn't be around for him to skin my arse?" Regulus asked with a half smile.

"Don't joke like that!"

"It's true, isn't it? He'd want to skin my arse, but I wouldn't be here." He laughed lightly, but it didn't reach his eyes.

"Regulus."

"Emmeline, you _aren't_ pregnant, are you?"

"No, no," she said quickly. "But… I don't know! I know you're going to… I love you, Reg, and this won't be easy on me… could you not make light of this?"

"Not too long ago, you told me I was better off dead."

She looked up at him. "I was angry, Regulus. I… I don't want you to die. But I know I can't stop you and… and I don't want you to keep risking your life like you are. If Remus or Sirius or James or Lily were to have to duel you…"

"I haven't killed anyone," he said suddenly. "Not one person. I… I tortured someone once, but I didn't like it at all. The first time I saw what it really meant, Em, I got sick. I was supposed to kill someone. Barty Crouch, Severus Snape, and I. I… I told them to leave, the family. Barty threw a fit, but Severus, I think he understood, he told Barty to shut his fucking mouth and never tell anyone anything. He didn't tell anyone, far as I can tell. I… I couldn't kill anyone like that, Em, in cold blood. I think I could kill any one of _them_, though. Bellatrix, Barty, Avery, Mulciber, Dolohov, especially the Dark Lord himself. Emmeline, don't… don't stop fighting, okay? If you have to go down, I want you to take as many Death Eaters down with you as you can."

She nodded.

"I love you," he whispered. "I never want you to forget that."

"I won't," she promised. "And I love you, too. I have since first year, I never told you that, but I have."

He took in a deep breath. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"What do you mean by that?"

"First year –when we were in the compartment with Sirius, Remus, and their friends?"

"Yes."

"Emmeline, if you'd have just told me, maybe we wouldn't be in this situation. My God, I've loved you since the day I met you!"

"You didn't tell me, either."

He sighed. "I should have listened to Sirius… he told me to tell you. But I didn't have enough guts."

"What were you like as a little kid?"

"Me?"

"Yes, you," she said, burying her face in his chest.

"Well…" –he began stroking her hair again—"Sirius and I were close. He was the brave one, I was always clutching… well, I had – have a stuffed dog… Leo. I always had him at my side, almost every memory I have from my childhood includes him. Aza and Meissa came over a lot, Meissa was always disapproving of whatever we were doing. It wasn't proper, it wasn't pure-blooded, it wasn't how children of the House of Black should behave… we laughed at her. Thunderstorms… I never liked them. I always went in Sirius's room and he'd comfort me. I was a coward, and I was terrified of my mother. My father was nothing compared to her. She told be to be in Slytherin or I'd be disowned. I… I was terrified. The hat wanted me to be in Ravenclaw, then in Gryffindor, but, I said no. I had to be a Slytherin. Every second of every day I wish I'd been anything else, even a Hufflepuff! But I wasn't… You know, I have no idea what you were like when you were younger?"

"I lived in London until I was seven, when my parents died. I went to live with Remus, and, I knew, what he was. I didn't care because he was my best friend, like the big brother I never had… he still is. When I was with my parents, they were always arguing or drunk. It wasn't pretty, and when I went to live with the Lupins, it was a completely different atmosphere. I loved it so much more there, and I didn't really miss my parents. They were drunk when they played that game, my mum blew her brains out. That's what they wanted. They wanted to die, and I knew it even then. Even if they'd gotten a divorce, it wouldn't have been happy for any of us. The way it was spread 'round was that they'd shot each other in a lover's quarrel, so that their life insurance would come through. It did, but I knew, and Remus and Auntie Lalie and Uncle Henry knew, but none of us spread it around. I knew I could become an Auror, because, I'd seen my parents kill each other, and hadn't done more than called the hospital, I saw Remus every month, and I knew he was tougher than I was, but he was so nice, it didn't show in him… I'd seen some of the worst, and knew I could make it… I know I can."

He held her even more tightly. "Em, you don't know how much I wish I wasn't what I was, so I could stay here with you, and…"

"Regulus, d'you think, if things had gone differently, we might've gotten married?"

"I'm sure we would have, love," he murmured.

"I'll miss you. I won't go a day without thinking about you."

"I'll miss you, too. But, please, don't stay stuck on me, Emmeline… I-I'm just a boy who caught your fancy, you'll find someone else – someone better."

She noticed how it seemed that he had to force the words out.

"Regulus, I love you. There's no one out there better for me than you, and I won't forget you, ever."

"You're going to grow up, and die old, surrounded by your family, because, you'll find someone that you love more than me, and you'll have done everything you've ever wanted to do."

She began to protest, but he kissed her.

"Emmeline, I don't want you to doubt that I love you. I love you more than I could ever say, and I want you to be happy, and you can't be happy if you're stuck on me."

Emmeline sighed. "I still love you. I always will."

"I know you will. Promise me you won't go down without a fight?"

"Promise."

_Author's Note: Well, __**much**__ longer than expected. But you've gotten a little background info, too. And now, I can update ITLOSB!_

_If you want to know how it all ends, review._


	16. The Lake: Age Eighteen

**The Lake: Age Eighteen**

"So you say this potion makes you relive your worst memories?" Regulus asked, glancing down unsurely at the green potion.

Kreacher nodded tearfully.

"Then, I've got a few orders. First off… don't let me stop drinking the potion, Kreacher, no matter how much I beg, okay?"

"Yes, Master Regulus."

"And I've got some memories I want you to keep for me. Put them inside of the wooden box underneath of my bed. I want you to put my memory from tonight in there, too. I'll give them to you after I drink the potion."

A nod. "But if Master Regulus were to give Kreacher his bad memories now…"

"No. I deserve to suffer for what I've done, Kreacher. It's repentance. Mum and Dad never did like me sneaking off to that Muggle church," he whispered. "Third, I want you to never tell any of the family about this." He closed his eyes and swallowed. "Even Sirius and Andromeda."

Kreacher nodded again.

"And when the Inferi start pulling me under," he glanced at the lake, "I want you to leave. Don't try to help me."

"But Master Regulus-!"

Regulus held up a hand. "That's an order. Tell Emmeline Vance that I love her… that I'm sorry I couldn't make it to the end of the war, and that I don't want her to play Juliet to my Romeo, or Carreen to my Brent. But don't let anyone else hear that Kreacher, I only want Emmeline to hear it… but if Remus Lupin's there, you can tell him, too. But _only,_ Emmeline and Remus at most, and only because Remus isn't too likely to trust you… or me for that matter…"

Tears were flowing out of the elf's overlarge eyes, and Regulus bit his lip, obviously close to tears himself, but he didn't go back on what he said. "This is it, then? Kreacher, you've been a good mate. One more order –after I'm dead, tell Lizzy, please. Tell her I'm sorry I couldn't make it to her wedding."

Kreacher nodded a fifth time. Regulus summoned up a goblet, which he raised in a mock toast. "To death."

**End.**

_**Author's Note:**__ dark, angsty, argh._

_No, before anyone asks: there's no romantic feelings between Lizzy and Regulus. They're best friends, and it's strictly platonic. I imagine Lizzy would be a little too scheming, talkative, and 'shut-up-because-you-know-I'm-right' for Regulus, and Regulus is probably too angsty, conflicted, and not-geeky for Lizzy._

_Sides, he loves Emmeline and Lizzy loves Brendon._

_I originally wrote this without the "Anarchy in the U.K." memory, but I've recently gotten really into the Sex Pistols, and I couldn't help myself. (laughs at thought of Regulus in punk clothes). The "Star-Crossed Lovers" "Russian Roulette" and "Romeo and Juliet" memories weren't originally in there either…_

_The toast to death was inspired by a line in the song "Mama" by My Chemical Romance: "So raise your glass high/for tomorrow we die" "Leave Out All The Rest" is a Linkin Park song, and it's brilliant, and fitting, and angsty. I'd love to do a oneshot on Regulus going to see the Sex Pistols, that'd just be awesome._

_Right, so I think that's it._

_**This is the last part.**__ Maybe I'll do a one-shot follow-up on Lizzy or Emmeline… this is really going to be mentioned in my story __**In the Life of Skye Black **__so try that one…_

_**Thank you everyone for all the reviews!**_

_Reviews are greatly appreciated._


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